


It's Getting Heavy and I Wanna Run and Hide

by acindra



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: Fake AH Crew, Jeremy and Ryan are there too but have no speaking lines, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-21
Updated: 2017-03-21
Packaged: 2018-10-08 22:05:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,168
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10397205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/acindra/pseuds/acindra
Summary: Ray loses a bet and has to wear a Sexy Santa outfit to the Christmas party. He uses this to his advantage.





	

Ray sighed and tugged his white thigh high stocking up over his knee. He smoothed it out carefully; if he was going to do this, he’d do it right. 

Even if it was embarrassing. Extremely so.

He shook himself- he could do this. 

He glanced at the mirror and noted with a frown that the corset part of the dress did him no favors. 

Unfortunately he could not fix that.

He sat down on his bed so he could put on the bright red boots, happy that the platform heels they had were relatively flat.

He stood up again and examined himself in the mirror. He straightened the skirt of the dress and nodded to himself, taking a deep breath.

He could do this.

In reality it was just clothes.

Awkward, plastic-y, revealing clothes, yes. But clothes nonetheless.

He grabbed the santa hat that was on the bed and pulled it on, flipping the bobble over his shoulder and out of the way.

Perfect.

Perfectly humiliating. But he made the outfit look good, even if he didn’t really have the cleavage for it.

He steeled himself. It probably wouldn’t be a bad night like he was imagining. Everyone would get drunk and forget about how he had to wear this stupid outfit because he lost a bet. 

He could do this. He could laugh it off, as he was wont to do. In the morning it would just be a memory.

And who knows? Maybe with a little luck he could even accomplish what he had been trying to do for ages.

-

The elevator dinged and opened to reveal the party already in full swing.

Ray sauntered into the room, the heels clicking against the hardwood floor and giving him a slight power trip.

Someone wolf whistled and a few people laughed as he passed by. He grinned back at them but continued on his way, searching for Gavin.

He found him by the fireplace, talking with Michael.

They both burst out laughing as he approached.

“Nice outfit, Ray.” Michael told him, plucking at the bobble at the end of his hat. “Did you steal it from Mrs. Claus?”

“Ha ha.” he responded, batting away Michael’s hand. “You happy, Vav? I did it.”

“Very. Now maybe you’ll take our bets seriously.”

Ray scoffed. “Please. We both know I’m better at shooters than you. It was a fluke. Next time I’m going to make you eat wet bread.”

Gavin gagged. “That’s not fair!”

Ray fixed him with a Look. “And you think _this_ is?” he asked, gesturing to his outfit.

Gavin shrugged. “If you had won I would have worn it.” he grinned. “But I wouldn’t have made it look so good. Trying to impress someone?”

Ray fought a blush. “ _No._ I’m gonna go get something to drink.”

“Go get ‘em, Ray!” Michael called after him.

He ignored the snickering that followed.

He approached the bar; the bartender didn’t even bat an eyelash as he asked what he wanted.

“Do you have cream soda?”

The bartender nodded and moved to retrieve some.

Ray glanced over and noticed Joel at the end of the bar. ‘Perfect’ he thought to himself.

The bartender handed over his drink.

“Thanks.” he grabbed his drink and sidled over to where Joel was sitting.

“Hey hot stuff.” he remarked, taking a sip of his cream soda. “I’ve been looking for you.”

Joel glanced over and suddenly froze, his eyes wide like a deer caught in the headlights. He seemed to fight it for a second before he allowed himself to check out Ray’s entire outfit, his eyes lingering at choice spots. 

Ray grinned, his body tingling under Joel’s intense gaze. “Take a picture, it’ll last longer.”

Joel’s eyes snapped back up to Ray’s and he blushed. “Can I?” he muttered.

“What?” Ray asked, leaning closer.

Joel glanced away, to the tumbler he had been leaning over full of warm brown liquid. “Can I take a picture?” he asked again, refusing to look back up at Ray.

Ray shrugged to himself. “Sure.”

Joel reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone, nearly fumbling it to the floor. As he lined up the camera for the photo, Ray leaned over with his hands clasped in front of him to emphasize his not-cleavage and winked exaggeratedly at the phone.

Joel snapped the picture then put his phone back in his pocket.

“Remember this- I want to know if you use that for anything… fun.” 

Joel turned brighter red. He looked at Ray earnestly. “I would _never_ -”

Ray smirked, walking his hand up Joel’s arm. “Now, Joel. It’s not nice to lie to me like that.”

Joel swallowed heavily as Ray got closer, shifting uncomfortably in his seat.

Ray could see he had gotten a little hard already. 

“I gotta- go?” he excused himself, chugging what was left of his drink and quickly pulling away. 

“Using it so soon?” Ray teased.

Joel stumbled a little as he got off the stool, but quickly pulled himself together and booked it across the room.

Ray didn’t mind. There were only so many places in the building for Joel to hide.

He tossed back the rest of his cream soda as well, then stalked back across the room to the elevator.

He managed to slip in just as the door was shutting.

At the click of his heels, Joel looked up and visibly paled. 

“R-Ray.” he stuttered, drawing back into the corner of the elevator.

“Joel.” Ray purred, coming closer. “Where do you think you’re going? I’m not done with you yet.” he said, running a finger down his chest.

“Ray, please.” Joel begged, shrinking even further back.

“Joel.” Ray continued, drawing even closer. He looked up at Joel through his eyelashes. “Please?”

Joel swallowed heavily, and Ray watched his Adam's apple bob. “Why are you doing this to me?”

Ray hummed under his breath, grabbing Joel’s hand. “Why do you do it to me?”

Joel stared at their clasped hands, his shaking minutely. “Please stop making fun of me, Ray. It’s not- it’s Christmas.” he begged weakly.

“I’m not making fun of you?” he replied, squeezing his hand reassuringly and running his thumb over the back. “Why would you think that?”

Joel shrugged helplessly. “Why would _you_ want…” 

The ding of the elevator made them both jump.

Ray glanced back to see they were at the penthouse level of the building. He tugged at Joel and drew them out of the elevator. He pulled them into the empty living room. 

The only source of light was a Christmas tree, twinkling away in the corner.

Ray lightly shoved Joel onto the couch and kneeled on either side of him, sitting on his legs.

Joel didn’t seem to know what to do with his hands or his eyes. “This really isn’t funny.”

Ray lifted his chin with a finger. He made eye contact and slowly leaned forward, giving Joel plenty of time to pull away before calmly pressing their lips together. 

Joel kissed back hesitantly.

“Does it look like I’m joking?” Ray asked quietly against his lips.

Joel surged forward, pressing against Ray desperately. 

His hands hovered uncertainly over Ray’s shoulders before coming back down to rest on the couch.

“You can touch me.” Ray told him, pulling away slightly to take in Joel’s lost expression.

His hands came up off the couch to cup Ray’s ass. He slid Ray closer so they could grind together.

Ray gasped. He steadied himself with a hand on Joel’s broad shoulder. He could feel Joel’s heart beating erratically against his chest as he moved against him.

Joel kissed him deeply, squeezing Ray’s ass through his dress.

Ray reached behind himself to move Joel’s hands and Joel pulled away like he had been burned.

“I’m- sorry! I didn’t mean to-”

“Joel.” 

“I promise I won’t-”

Ray kissed him again to get him to stop babbling. “It’s ok. I said you could touch me. I just wanted to get my shorts off.”

“Shorts?” Joel asked, a little confused.

Ray pulled up the skirt of the dress to reveal tight black booty shorts.

Joel’s eyes went wide as he saw Ray’s bulge.

Ray leaned over and whispered huskily, “I’m just very happy to see you,” before kissing him on the cheek and getting up off of Joel and the couch. He turned around and bent over so Joel could see his ass. He hooked his fingers on the hem of his shorts and wiggled a little to get them off his hips. He pulled them up off his dick and slid them down so they were around his thighs, looking over his shoulder to wink at Joel again. 

Joel seemed very appreciative of the view so he continued to pull the shorts off, over his white thigh high socks and the bright red plastic boots.

“Are you enjoying yourself?” he asked, turning back around and leaving the shorts on the ground.

Joel nodded hesitantly, his eyes drawn to the tent in the skirt of Ray’s dress.

Ray kneeled on the couch over Joel again. “I’m glad.” His hands went to Joel’s belt, deftly unbuckling it as he kissed Joel again. “You always look so handsome in a suit.” he remarked as he undid Joel’s pants. 

“I’m always in a suit.”

“Then you’re always handsome.” He reached a hand in and pulled Joel’s dick from the confines of his underwear.

Joel made a funny little noise as he stroked him slowly, feeling the weight of his dick in his hand.

“You ok there?” Ray asked.

Joel nodded frantically. 

Ray let go and placed his hands on Joel’s. “C’mon, I know you want to touch me.”

Joel looked bashful almost as he slid his hands to rest on Ray’s waist.

Ray sighed. “Joel.” he whined. “I don’t want to do this all by myself.”

Joel pulled Ray closer again and slipped a hand around both of their dicks, pumping them slowly, using their precum to make them a little slippery.

Ray moaned happily as Joel’s lips found his neck. He closed his eyes and let himself memorize the feel of their dicks pressed against each other and Joel’s hand on them.

“You’re so pretty.” Joel mumbled against his neck, nipping at his earlobe.

Ray smirked, opening his eyes and pulling away. “I bet you say that to all the boys.”

“Only the pretty ones.” he paused, then shook his head. “Only you.”

“I’m flattered.” Ray blinked up at him. “ _Oh_.” he moaned as Joel ran his thumb over the head of his dick. He shifted his hips and brought a hand up to encourage Joel to go faster.

Joel went back to kissing Ray’s neck, sucking hard on particularly sensitive spots that made Ray moan and writhe against him.

Ray knew he was probably leaving bruises. He was excited to see how everyone would react to them. “Do it harder. I want everyone to see.” he told him.

Joel drew away in surprise. “Do you like being marked, Ray?” he asked in a low voice that went straight to Ray’s dick. 

“Only when it’s you.” he admitted. “I like it when you claim me.”

Joel groaned and captured his lips again, letting Ray run his hands through his already messy hair.

Joel pulled away to stare at Ray, liking how the light from the Christmas tree threw shadows across his visage. 

Ray tugged on his tie to get his attention back to kissing. He could feel that he was getting close, the static feeling of arousal having spread over his body. 

It seemed Joel was getting close, too, as he sped up the hand wrapped around them and pressed himself against Ray’s body.

“Fuck, Ray.” Joel said against his lips as he shuddered and came.

Ray grinned. “I’ve got lube downstairs if you wanna.”

Joel whined and focused on getting Ray off.

It wasn’t long before Ray gasped and came between them as well.

Joel pumped him through his orgasm, before finally placing his hand on Ray’s bare thigh.

Ray kissed him again, languidly, as they came off their high.

They were still kissing a half an hour later when the elevator dinged and Geoff stepped out.

It took a few seconds for his eyes to adjust to the dark room but he spotted them almost immediately.

“What are you doing to my poor couch?” he yelled, squinting at them. “What are you doing to my sniper?!”

Ray snorted. “Priorities.”

Joel, on the other hand, looked like he was trying to meld into the couch in the face of Geoff’s ire.

“What are you even doing up here, man? The party’s downstairs.” Ray asked, not bothering to cover anything up.

Geoff’s eye twitched. “I _own_ this place you little brat. I can do what I want!” He realized he was staring at them and slapped a tattooed hand over his eyes. “I need bleach.” he muttered. “Get out. Right now. There better not be any jizz on my couch or I swear to god I’m going to shoot you both.”

Ray looked at Joel and shrugged. “Wanna go downstairs and fuck me into my mattress?”

Geoff made a choking noise.

Joel looked from Geoff to Ray a couple times before nodding. 

Ray pulled away reluctantly and tucked Joel back into his pants, buttoning them up but forgoing the belt. He got up and held out a hand to Joel to help him up, too. He bent over to pick up his discarded shorts and tucked them into Joel’s pocket before tugging him over to the elevator.

“Don’t wait up for us.” Ray called to Geoff as the doors closed behind them, smirking at the anguished noise Geoff made.

In the light of the elevator, Joel looked utterly wrecked, his hair and suit a mess and cum splattered across his stomach.

He wondered if he looked the same. 

From the way Joel was devouring him with his eyes he surmised he probably did. 

“See something you like?” he teased. 

“Yes.” Joel replied, quietly.

“You know, Joel. It’s odd. I always thought you’d be more… assertive in bed.” he remarked.

Joel fixed him with a serious stare. “Do you want me to be?” he asked in a voice that made Ray half hard.

“Yes.” he replied breathlessly. “Don’t you see the outfit?” he asked, gesturing to himself. “I’m your present this year.” He fingered the lace on the front of his outfit. “Unwrap me and do what you want with me.” he told him, trying his best to give him a sultry look. 

Joel crowded him into a corner, his eyes dark with lust. He kissed Ray roughly, his hands running down his back.  
Ray let out a muffled yelp in surprise when his hands made their way down to squeeze his ass cheeks. 

Joel chuckled against Ray’s lips and spread his cheeks a little so he could run a finger over his asshole.

Ray gasped as he circled the hole. “Are we gonna fuck in the elevator?” he asked. “ Don’t be _naughty_ , Joel, we don’t even have lube yet.”

Joel rolled his eyes as the elevator dinged and let them stumble out onto the floor, releasing Ray from his grasp.

They had been lucky nobody from the party had called the elevator.

Ray quickly unlocked the door to his apartment and dragged Joel inside, slamming the door shut behind him.

When they got to the bedroom, Joel dithered in the doorway, his hand in his pocket. “Can I um… can I take more pictures of you?” he asked, hesitantly. 

Ray’s eyes lit up. “Yeah! I’ll even pose for you.” He crawled up on the bed and stuck his booty out, looking back over his shoulder.

Joel swallowed heavily and pulled out his phone to take the picture. 

“Do you have any requests?” Ray asked, only partially teasing as he rolled over to sit on the bed, in a very ‘draw me like one of your french girls’ style. 

Joel took the picture then moved to reposition Ray gently. He had Ray sit properly in the middle of the bed then splay his legs out in front of him suggestively.

Ray blew the camera a kiss.

Joel made to put away his phone but Ray crawled over and snatched it up before he could. 

He quickly snapped a picture of Joel, disheveled from their earlier tryst, and texted it to his own phone. He handed the phone back. “Remember, I want you to tell me when you use those.” he told Joel. “And I want you to use them, ok?”  
Joel nodded.

“Maybe if I have to dress up again we can do more…” he mused as he crawled over to his bedside table to grab a tube of lube from the drawer.

“We can do this again?” Joel asked.

Ray gave him a look of disbelief. “Are you kidding me? I threw a bet to get to wear this outfit to seduce you.”

Joel seemed to struggle with that information. “You wanted to-”

Ray scooted to the edge of the bed and got up. “Wanted and succeeded.” he wrapped his arms around Joel’s waist. “And you won’t be getting rid of me so easily, Heyman.” he informed him. “You can be my sugar daddy.” he said thoughtfully.

Joel nodded.

“Wait- seriously?”

Joel shrugged. “If you want.”

Ray did an exaggerated fist pump. “Yes! I can be a kept boy! Look at me now, momma.”

“Please don’t tell me you have a daddy kink. I don’t think I can do that.”

“Nah. I’m just joking around.” Ray reassured him. “Sit down on the bed and I’ll try to blow you a little.”

Joel raised an eyebrow at him but obediently sat down on the bed.

“I’ve never done this before.” Ray admitted, undoing his pants again. “But it should be pretty easy, right?” he tugged at Joel’s pants and boxers until Joel shifted so he could pull them down until they were around his feet. “Don’t use teeth and suck.” he told mostly himself. “Oh. Here take this.” he handed over the tube of lube.

He kneeled in front of Joel and wrapped a hand around his half hard dick. He flicked his tongue across the head and pulled away, cringing. “Ok, well, that’s weird. Not horrible, but weird.”

“You don’t have to.” Joel told him.

Ray shrugged. “I’ve put weirder things in my mouth.” he grinned at the face Joel made. He came back in and sucked the head into his mouth, careful to put his lips over his teeth. He sucked a little more into his mouth and ran his tongue along the side.

Joel made an appreciative noise above him, his hands clenched into fists on the bed.

Ray glanced up at him through his eyelashes, hollowing his cheeks as he sucked. 

“Fuck.” Joel choked out. “If you keep looking at me like that I’ll come.”

Ray pulled off of him. “So soon? That’d be a shame. You wouldn’t be able to fuck me.” he went back to sucking Joel’s dick.

What he didn’t have in technique he made up for with studious concentration, noting the noises Joel made when he did certain things.

Joel fought hard to not buck up into his mouth but failed to keep himself all the way in check so Ray had to hold his hips down as he bobbed his head along his dick. 

Eventually he reached up to thread his hands through Ray’s hair, but Ray pulled away. “Nuh uh. No face-fucking. Only ass-fucking tonight.” Ray rubbed his jaw a little. “I think that’s as much as I can do anyways. My mouth is kinda tired.”

Joel leaned down almost off the bed to kiss at Ray’s swollen lips. “You were wonderful.”

Ray snorted. “I’ll show you how wonderful I can be.” he said, getting up. “Let’s get this show on the road. How do you want me?”

“On every surface of every inch of this place.” Joel replied, promptly. “Repeatedly.”

Ray rolled his eyes. “And how do you want me _right now_?”

“On your hands and knees on the bed.” Joel told him, scooting out of the way and kicking off his pants and shoes.

“Yes _sir._ ” he purred lasciviously.

Joel gave his ass a swat as he climbed onto the bed. “Behave.”

Ray adopted a faux innocent look. “But I’m on the nice list.”

“Oh really? Because you’re being awfully naughty.” Joel replied, his fingers trailing up the backs of Ray’s thighs.

“I don’t know. I seem to recall being very _nice_ to you just now.” Ray said, pouting at him. “So nice I deserve a reward, some might say.” he prompted, wiggling his butt a little.

“Or maybe a punishment.” Joel replied, pouring some lube onto his fingers. He lifted Ray’s skirt and lay it down on his back, admiring the view.

“You lost back there?” Ray asked after a few seconds of inaction.

“You have a nice ass. I can’t wait to be in it.”

“Well maybe if you would actually do something, we could get there.” Ray told him, impatiently.

Joel sighed, muttering about how the youth these days had no sense of patience as he spread Ray’s asscheeks. He spent no time teasing, figuring Ray would call him on it, and slipped a finger inside him. 

“You can do more.” Ray told him as he wiggled his finger in deeper. “I prepared a little before the party.”

“Expecting something, were you?” Joel asked as he slid another finger in alongside his other one.

“More like hopeful.” Ray admitted, pushing back against Joel’s hand eagerly.

Joel’s fingers were longer than his and it wasn’t long until his blunt nails found his prostate, making Ray shiver in delight.

He bit his lip as Joel added a third finger, impatient. But he knew it would probably be worth the wait, as Joel had a decent girth.

Joel pushed them in past the knuckle and began to slowly scissor them open, leaving Ray breathing a little more heavily than before. ”Do you want me to fuck you like this?” he asked. “On your hands and knees like a good little-”

“I want to see you.” Ray interrupted.

Joel hummed in agreement. “Missionary, then. You can watch as I fuck you open.”

“Can we get to it, then? I’m not getting any younger over here.”

Joel scowled as he pulled his fingers out of Ray. “You and me both. Turn over.”

Ray rolled over so he could lay on his back, his legs splayed open once again. “Punish me, sir, I’ve been naughty.” he said in an exaggeratedly high voice, wiggling his eyebrows at Joel.

“Are you always going to be like this?” Joel asked, scooting so he was between Ray’s legs. He tugged Ray’s ass up onto his lap.

“You love it.” Ray said, sticking his tongue out.

Joel retorted “No, I love-” then bit down on his own tongue to keep from saying ‘you’. He hadn’t meant to say it at all. 

But Ray wouldn’t let it go that easily.

“Joel.” Ray said, sitting up.

Joel refused to meet his eyes. “Are we going to do this or what?”

Ray caressed his cheek. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Joel scoffed. “What’s there to talk about? A lonely old man who’s in love with his young-as-fuck friend? A friend who offered to have sex with him multiple times? But now he’s ruined it because he can’t keep his fucking mouth shut?”

“Joel.”

“I’m sorry.” he ran a hand through his hair.

“Joel.” Ray said sternly, tilting his head up so Joel would make eye contact with him. “It’s okay.”

Joel pursed his lips but didn’t say anything.

“I’m not in love with you.” Ray told him, watching as he swallowed back his emotions towards that statement. “But! I do have a stupid crush on you.” he continued. “And who knows? I could love you.” Ray leaned up to kiss him. “So it’s okay if you love me.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

Joel let Ray kiss his troubled expression away.

“Now, are you going to fuck me or not? Because I’m hard and all dolled up for you. I don’t do that for just anybody.”

Joel kissed Ray again, lowering him back onto the mattress. “I’m clean, are you?”

Ray nodded. “I’ve never had sex with another guy.”

“I haven’t either. Are you sure you w-”

“Yes.” Ray interrupted. “Very sure.”

Joel slid his hand up Ray’s dick, prolonging the wait just in case Ray changed his mind anyways.

“Joel I swear to god if you do not fuck me in the next couple of minutes I will tie you down and ride you like a horse.” Ray complained.

Joel exhaled heavily and slathered some lube on his dick. “What makes you think _I’m_ ready for this?” he muttered.

“Are you?” Ray asked, suddenly concerned. “If you’re not we don’t have to.”

Joel gave him a small smile. “I’m fine. I just- don’t want to hurt you.”

Ray shook his head. “If millions of gay guys can do this without serious injury, I’m sure we’ll be fine. Penetrate me, Joel!”

Joel made a face at him. “Seriously, must you be like this?”

Ray threw his head back into the mattress, chanting. “Come on, come on, come on!”

Finally Joel lined himself up with Ray and pushed in a little. His head popped in and Ray took a deep breath. “You ok?” Joel asked, rubbing a hand over Ray’s stomach.

Ray nodded. “Just- you’re bigger than your fingers.” he told him, wiggling his own in the air.

“Does it hurt?”

“No, just feels… weird. Keep going?” Ray requested.

Joel slowly inched forward, pushing inside of Ray with little resistance.

Ray was breathing heavily, his hands balled into fists in the comforter. “Man that is weird.”

“Yeah?” Joel asked, distracted by trying to push in slowly.

“Yeah. I feel… full.”

Joel stopped, running a hand down one of Ray’s legs. 

It was a lot tighter than having sex with a person who had a vagina- and a lot less wet. 

He was worrying that maybe he hadn’t used enough lube when Ray shifted his hips closer.

“Are you all the way in?” Ray asked, lifting his head to peer at the intersection of their bodies.

“No.” Joel admitted. “Are you su-”

“Joel you are literally inside of me.” Ray slapped a hand over his eyes. “ _Yes, I’m sure_. Jesus christ just fuck me already.”

Joel lifted one of Ray’s legs a little and thrust into him gently.

“ _Oh._ ”

Joel pulled out a little and thrust in again, watching Ray’s expression carefully. “Alright?”

“I mean it’s not terrible. Nothing to write home about, though.”

Joel slowly worked up a rhythm, which Ray seemed pleased enough with. It took him a while, but eventually he worked out where Ray’s prostate was.

“ _Joel_.” Ray gasped, his asshole clenching around him. 

“Good? Bad?”

“Good. Very good. Do that again.”

Joel lifted Ray’s legs up and leaned over him so he could have more leverage, pushing in deeper.

Ray clutched at his arms, moaning as he was fucked into.

Joel leaned down further so he could kiss him.

“Harder, please.” he requested, moving his hips against Joel’s.

Joel complied to his wishes, reaching down so he could jack Ray off, too.

“Oh god, this is great!” Ray told him, wrapping his legs around his waist. The plastic of his boots squeaking a little against the material of his suit jacket. “Is it good for you, too?” he asked as Joel kissed his neck again.

Joel nodded into Ray’s shoulder; he could feel his orgasm coming. “Will you come for me, Ray?” he asked, barely above a whisper, trying to hit his prostate with every thrust.

Ray gasped out his name as he did just that, adding to the semen that was already splattered across his stomach.  
Joel groaned as Ray tightened around him, and bit down on his shoulder as he came inside him. 

They both spent a minute just breathing against each other.

When Joel pulled away to check on Ray, he found that Ray’s eyes were blown wide. 

“Ok, I take it back. _That_ is a weird feeling.” Ray told him.

“What?”

“You cumming inside me. It’s- warm?” he squirmed a little as Joel pulled out of him.

“Unpleasant?”

“Not really.”

Joel heaved himself up off Ray and rolled over so he could lay on the bed next to him.

“The leaking out of me part is kind of hot in a weird way.” Ray remarked, rolling onto his side so he could face Joel. “We should probably take a shower, huh?” he asked, fiddling with Joel’s tie.

Joel eyed him suspiciously. “Are you aiming for shower sex?”

“Maybe a little.”

Joel shook his head. “You’re going to have to give me at least an hour or I might have a heart attack.”

Ray grinned at him. “It was worth a shot.” He stretched languidly. “We should actually shower, though. I don’t want to fall asleep covered in jizz.”

Joel reached over to push the hat’s bobble in Ray’s face, who spluttered. “You also probably don’t want to sleep in this outfit.”

“Psh, naw. I’d miss out on creeping into everyone’s houses to leave gifts and eat free cookies in my dreams.”

Joel pouted. “But I’d miss you in my dreams.”

Ray patted his cheek. “Then you’ll be extra glad when I’m back in the morning.” He looked uncertain for a moment. “You liked this, right? Or do you want me to get you a real Christmas gift?”

Joel leaned over and kissed him happily. “You are a wonderful Christmas gift.”

“Good. Cuz it’ll be one that keeps on giving.” he said with a wink, finally dragging himself into a sitting position. “Now come on, lazy bones. We should shower.”

-

The next morning found them in the elevator, Joel in a borrowed hoodie and pajama pants and Ray in his standard black shirt and jeans.

He forwent the purple hoodie to show off his neck, decorated with hickeys.

They were also a little rumpled from the sex they had had earlier upon waking up.

Stepping out into the penthouse they were greeted by cheers and wolf-whistles by their friends.

“Congratulations!” Lindsay told them, handing them glasses of eggnog. “We’re just about to start opening presents.” she told them as Gavin, Michael, and Jeremy drew Ray away to make fun of him.

Geoff’s expression soured when he saw Joel, but he didn’t say anything, just looked pointedly at the couch. No one seemed to notice but Ryan, but he didn’t say anything either.

“Sorry Joel, I don’t have my present for you here. I wasn’t expecting to see you until later.” Jack apologized.

“It’s alright. I already got the best present last night.” Joel told him.

“Damn right you did.” Ray called over. “My ass is a gift from god!”

It was a very merry Christmas, indeed.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry.


End file.
